Jack's Glow Up (7/23)

Jack begged for a gym membership and despite having concerns about an overzealous approach, we acquiesced because summers are long and hot. We created rules and structure; in addition, his coach joined us by opposing certain exercises in order to keep the range of motion needed for tennis. Jack's efforts quickly showed and when he returned to school, he was met with comments like, "Dude, the bulk is looking good!" When we compared his orthodontic before and after shots, the after pic has been lovingly dubbed his 'glow up pic'.

In addition to getting stronger, Jack continues working hard on the tough mental game of tennis. His stroke is powerful, accuracy is improving, strategies are sound, and technique has finesse but he sometimes loses track of the score and did have an on-court blowup where he screamed, "Stop it, Mom!" mid match. 

His norm is to be patient, polite and kind. His humor is savvy and he brings levity to almost any situation. He is fun to be around and quick to respond with 'love you' on texts and phone calls. 

... What were his sticky spread requests you ask? caramel corn was at the top of the list!

Luke, I am your Fahu (7/23)

Luke called ahead of his wedding to inform me that as the patriarchal aunt, I'd have a special role at his wedding. He said that, as the Fahu in Polynesian culture, I'd be treated like royalty and given gifts. He was brief about their traditional wedding and what it entailed but I confirmed availability, how I should dress, and ensured that I knew how to pronounce his fiance's name. I also managed to ask what responsibilities came with the title but he replied, "nothing". When we hung up, I googled Fahu and was surprised to see that culturally she is the matriarch who holds responsibilities such as the naming of children in the family. I reached out to my brother but got vague answers and more unanswered questions. Their wedding was on the tail end of our Lake Powell trip so I focused heavily on logistics and getting everyone there instead of worrying too much about what to expect.

When we arrived in Salt Lake City, I was greeted as "Fahu" by Fetu. Other times, I was labeled "Queen Mandy". Most of the weekend's wedding celebrations were very casual - the dance starting 2.5 hrs late and a late temple ceremony too. The wedding reception was a fun, formal party and I participated as Palagi royalty. I was greeted with a beautiful lei (Dave too - who was also famed for his Fahu proximity), served a larger dinner with 5 types of meat at a specially designated table with Renee (the other Fahu), was surprised by an honorary money dance, and gifted with handmade gifts (afghans) and a portion of the wedding cake. It really was such a treat! 

(In retrospect, her Fahu had schizophrenia so I was likely released from many formalities because of that but I really wish I'd been prepared with a formal money dance for the couple.)

  

how do i have a 17 year old? (3/23)

Birthday season proved tricky for the newbies in town. Kindin found it difficult to decipher exactly who were close enough friends to celebrate with and uncertain about how to let loose with her new friends. We settled on hosting a permanent jewelry party with just a few girls.

At 17, I'm realizing that my time with her is limited. We have about 75 weeks with her before she leaves the house. I have 75 weeks to... giggle, play, connect, teach, and inspire her. [Giggling is what I'll miss the most - observing AZ's tricky winter grass quality, she joked, "You have a pretty good chance of finding a 4 leaf clover back here."] I have started more deliberately chatting with her late into the night even though I'd rather be in bed. And I am providing independent living skills such as sending her to get an oil change all on her own. 

Some trivia about Kindin at this age: she is most frequently called "Cocoa" at home by her parents whom she refers to as "Sussy" or "Boss", she can't keep a poker face, she will always treat herself to extra mayo, she has never had to be told to clean her room but is the messiest cook, she has adopted a funny racoon noise for the sake of ridiculousness, she remedies generalized worry with a run, she would play tennis 3x/ day if her body allowed it, she is limited to one request/meal for others to chew with their mouth closed, she continues to excel at school, she has been given more freedom to decide her curfew with less check-ins but still shows a desire to please her parents, Jack's friends are all madly in love with her, and she employs a what's yours is mine mentality - whether it's hairspray, floss, a charging cord, shampoo, shoes, or fingernail clippers.

entry remodel complete (2/23)

In a hurry to secure Dalia's room, we started remodeling our front entry space almost immediately. I was also surprised by how much mental space and energy it took with lots of last minute, stressful decisions. Here's the before photos:

The after pics are fabulous and Dolly is happy to have her own room. We used off the cuff design help from aunt Sarah and Andrea who both always have a great eye for these things.

Remodeling an entire backyard feels like a nightmare... 

sliding into 6th positions (2/23)

Tennis is competitive in Mesa! We knew it would be so quickly got them connected to a tennis pro. Jack felt his new coach worked 'magic' but both were still extremely worried. Mom was even more worried. 2 weeks of tryouts was pure torture as I prayed fervently that they'd make it - terrified that it'd be perpetual ammunition against Mesa if they didn't. Thankfully, Heavenly parents answered an earthly mother's fervent prayer and both kids squeezed onto the team... just barely at the 6th positions. 

What followed was a really challenging season - where both kids learned some valuable lessons, made friendships, and improved their game. 

school at the funny farm (3/23)

Dalia had a pretty rotten school experience with the move. Downgraded to elementary school, she found herself wrapped up in recess drama and tied to the same 30 people all day. In addition, she had an inexperienced teacher who relied heavily on her for math concepts every day. We made a few attempts to remedy things but kept hitting a wall. In addition, Dalia was slated for a different junior high than her territorial classmates anyhow. All in all, she made a good attempt but the battle felt fruitless. We strongly encouraged Dalia to change schools but worried at the same time. After spring break, she switched to the elementary that a few friends in the ward attend for an 8 week respite from the drama. Our only hope was that she made 1 or 2 friends for the summer and regained her social self esteem that had taken quite a hit. Dalia was placed in a classroom with a teacher who owns a few animals - including: a 200 pound tortoise named Carl, 2 smaller tortoises, 2 chickens, and 12 baby chicks. Her collection grew throughout the year to add 2 additional ducks. The kids are in charge of animal chores and get to name each new animal. Dalia's first week brought the chore of feeding Carl the leftover lunches every day. Higher ability learning programs were no longer the only highlight to her week. And better yet, she felt welcomed by her classmates without unordinary drama and has met a friend whom she sees outside of school often. And, of course, she comes home with plenty of animal stories. 

And to Think, All I Wanted was a Boat (12/22)

We were recruited for a commercial on the boat ramp at Saguaro lake. Not interested in opening myself to public scrutiny or even just the public eye, I wanted to say no. But I looked at my daughter who desperately wants fame and said maybe. After checking legitimate credentials, I had no choice but to say yes. And it was unnerving but incredible! Not only a fun, unique experience that I never thought I'd have but a crowning moment from years of dreaming. As a kid, I always wanted a boat and knew I'd find a man who could get me and my kids on the lake. As able, we carefully prioritized opportunities to be on the lake together. And as needed, enforced it as family time. Typically, all want to go because we make it fun but sometimes we've fought teenage angst. Shooting a commercial was crowning in that it validated a move cross country and also recognized the dreams I'd always had of having a boating family. Besides also nodding to the fact that we were doing an OK job of it! In that moment, many years of dreaming culminated with reality and I whispered to Dave, "and to think all I wanted was a boat". It was a perfect opportunity! 

On shooting day, the kids were enamored with the 'greeking' required and being served food like celebrities. We were shot with drone footage, cameras on the boat and a pantoon boat beside us. We ran the same sequence over and over in order to get 'the perfect shot'. And although air and water temp were 50 degrees, we were all paid and the kids skipped school for it. All with no need for a "bio break".

Many Mesa locals have spotted our commercial - some have questions and we're relieved to explain but others don't and it's an odd feeling for it to be the first impression of us. But it was such a good time!