Luke called ahead of his wedding to inform me that as the patriarchal aunt, I'd have a special role at his wedding. He said that, as the Fahu in Polynesian culture, I'd be treated like royalty and given gifts. He was brief about their traditional wedding and what it entailed but I confirmed availability, how I should dress, and ensured that I knew how to pronounce his fiance's name. I also managed to ask what responsibilities came with the title but he replied, "nothing". When we hung up, I googled Fahu and was surprised to see that culturally she is the matriarch who holds responsibilities such as the naming of children in the family. I reached out to my brother but got vague answers and more unanswered questions. Their wedding was on the tail end of our Lake Powell trip so I focused heavily on logistics and getting everyone there instead of worrying too much about what to expect.
When we arrived in Salt Lake City, I was greeted as "Fahu" by Fetu. Other times, I was labeled "Queen Mandy". Most of the weekend's wedding celebrations were very casual - the dance starting 2.5 hrs late and a late temple ceremony too. The wedding reception was a fun, formal party and I participated as Palagi royalty. I was greeted with a beautiful lei (Dave too - who was also famed for his Fahu proximity), served a larger dinner with 5 types of meat at a specially designated table with Renee (the other Fahu), was surprised by an honorary money dance, and gifted with handmade gifts (afghans) and a portion of the wedding cake. It really was such a treat!
(In retrospect, her Fahu had schizophrenia so I was likely released from many formalities because of that but I really wish I'd been prepared with a formal money dance for the couple.)
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